Sunday, November 30, 2008


Wow, what a week it has been. This week has been one of the hardest weeks of my life. I am so thankful to God that He has walked each step of the way for me. That He has put many in my and my families path that have been so comforting to us. To all of you that have prayed and gone out of your way to reach out, THANK YOU!!!! We are making it through this terrible sadness. God is carrying us through you. So many have called, so many have come and we are just so blessed. I sometimes take it for granted that we have such a tremendous supportive network of family and friends. Thank you to all of you who have reached out to us. The loss of RJ has come as an incredible shock to all of us. I ask that you continue to lift us up in these coming days and weeks, especially on tuesday as we plan to say our goodbys to him. Please pray for Denise and Ron, that they get peace in this situation, strength and hope. That they are just held in the palm of our Lord;s hand and that they truly will feel Him all around them.
Thanksgiving is truly a time to be thankful, and although we have lost this beautiful little angel boy this week, I am truly thankful for my God who is still upon the throne, My God who is carrying us through this valley we are in. My God who provides people in our paths that say and do the right things at the right time. My God who is providing employment and finances, my God who has Samuel and his health in His hand. My God who is building and strengthening my marriage. I am so thankful that I was there for RJ's birth, that I could hold him and pray for him, and that one day I will see him again. I am thankful that he is not alone and that He truly is God's child now. I know that there are hard days ahead, but I know that as God has walked each step so far with us, that He will continue to walk with us.
Again thank you to all of you for your prayers and support, and please continue to pray for Ron and Denise as the funeral will no doubt be very difficult. Be thankful for your blessings, be thankful for your family, be thankful to God who is there in each and every situation that we will ever face.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Unimaginable sorrow

As I write this tonight my heart is truly broken, words cannot express the sadness that flows through me at this very moment. My sister Denise and I went for an ultrasound on monday and while there we found out that her baby had died. She had to go through labor and deliver him. He is the most beautiful little boy with a head of silky black hair. He is perfect in every way. Denise is unbelievably strong and she was amazing through the labor. And as I watch her and Ron holding Sophia I can only imagine what is running through their minds. I don't know why they need her right now, but I know that whatever they need we will do our best to offer. Pray for Dasanee and Davion as they are asking so many questions and are too young to understand.
If you are reading this I ask that you would just lift Denise and Ron and their other children up in continual prayer as they walk this path of unimaginable sorrow. As thanksgiving is tomorrow remember to be thankful for your family, don't take for granted that you will be together tomorrow. We are never promised a tomorrow. We are promised eternity and we know we will see RJ one day again. I know for now he is in the arms of my Savior, but right now we want him here with us. Pray for us please.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Beautiful Girl

Could she possibly be any cuter? I know I am totally partial but I am just so in love with this beautiful little face.

Sam continues to feel awful. Today he was crying so much. I have to practically force him to eat these days. I am so frustrated with all of this. He has been feeling awful off and on for his whole life. And I just want him to be healed. I want him to be well. I want him to be a normal two year old kid, who doesn't ram his fists into his stomach because it is hurting, a two year old who doesn't turn down all food (even his favorites) because he is so uncomfortable. Please pray for him.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Nana's House

Hanging out with Grandma and Papa

Sammy tried on Uncle Jay's glasses

Sitting with Nana

We all got together at Grandma Buckner's yesterday. Sam got to spend time with the family and we had a nice time.

A sad day

Auntie TeeTee wanted to pack us up and take us with her, as you can see we were perfectly willing.

Like the turkey on her bottom? Sam wore this for his first thanksgiving, and he was four months younger than she is!!!

I like your beard Uncle Danny

We love our Auntie TeeTee

I have been dreading this day for months. Today Matt's Aunt and Uncle (and mine too) left to drive across county and move to Oregon. How can I express the sadness I feel in them leaving.
Terri has been truly amazing these last few years. She has bent over backwards a million times to help us however possible. She has cancelled appointments, made us dinner, cleaned, and the biggest blessing loved my kids and been there for them over and over again. She has been a sounding board and an encouragement to me with all of the medical stuff that has happened. She kept me sane while I was on bedrest with Sophia and was over so often to help out.
Terri, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for who you are, for being like a mother, sister, friend aunt, etc. I have been so blessed to have you in my life and in the lives of our children. Sam has learned so much from you and loves you so deeply. Thank you for your endless generosity and love, for your kindness and self sacrifice. I LOVE YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART!!!! You are already tremendously missed and we look forward to your return.

This is what happens....

When you leave Sam with a marker to go change Sophia's diaper. Thank goodness they are washable.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Cutie Patooties

Just pics of my two little love bugs. It has been a trying day, Sam was up probably 10 plus times last night crying. I think that there is something new going on with him again. Please pray. Of course Sophia slept well last night, isn't that the way? One sleeps the other doesn't. Anyways please pray for my Sam, for his health, for him to have no pain, for his doctors to have wisdom, for us to have patience, etc.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

So very thankful

So very thankful for these beautiful babies

This picture is from before this wonderful blessing of the actual physical part of being a mom began. It's hard to believe that just that since 2006 so many wonderful things have happened. My life is so full, I am so blessed

I don't even know where to begin. I am so blessed to be surrounded by so many wonderful people. I don't feel worthy of their love. I am not sure what the reason is behind it but my friends have totally taken me under their wings this month and totally made me feel loved and appreciated. I just so don't deserve all of this but I am so very grateful. I wonder if with all of the issues with finances and Matt losing his job, and Sam being so sick an deverything if that is the reason. Regardless THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU!!! For the special lunch that we had, for the movie night, for the cleaning, for the words of encouragement, for the lunch and two hands free for eating (instead of feeding a child), for the massage, for the haircut and pedicure....etc etc. I am so blessed. Thank you to all of you for reminding me that I am important, that I have an identity that is more than just taking care of everyone else. Thank you thank you!!! Thank you for helping me to be a better mommy by taking care of me too. Look at this old photo

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Jacob's 5th Birthday Party

Today after church we went up to Tim and Tracy's house for Jacob's fifth birthday party. It was a Patriots theme. Sam had a wonderful time playing with all of the kids. IT was wild and crazy, he kind of watched more than he played with the kids, I think he was kind of overwhelmed since he was the youngest running around.
He is continueing to complain of stomach pain intermittently, I will call the doctor tomorrow. He has also been getting the hiccups very frequently in the lst few days. Does anyone know if thre is anything significant to the hiccuping thing?